13 October 2006

Damn these music memes.

Blame Melissa for this one.

IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?

THE RULES:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool...

I did move some of the scenes around for the sake of continuity. And then I gave up and went with the flow instead of trying to be so anal. And I cut several scenes, like the "Waking Up" scene, because everybody knows those scenes are boring.

Opening Credits:
"Man on the Moon" -- REM
Okay, so the movie's out there, or it's about Andy what's-his-name.

First Day At School:
"A Riverboat's Gone/Bumblebee in a Jig" -- April Verch
It's taken a folksy turn with a fiddle. Country girl going to school, tra la!

Falling In Love:
"The Tide is High" -- Blondie
Ha ha! And now she sees a hot man at her school and she's going to chase him all over town! And then she gets her hands on him. Hey handsome, the tide is high. So let's go to the prom. And he says okay, of course.

Prom:
"Nobody" -- Sylvia. That old country song about a gal whose husband is cheating on her. Let's try a different one.
"No One Like You" -- Scorpions. Okay, an 80's prom and they're playing the metal ballads. I can dig. Except he spikes her punch and they end up in a hotel room. And when she wakes up, she's so pissed.

Breaking Up:
"I'm Still Crazy" -- Vern Gosdin
OMG, this is so appropriate! "Well, I woke up one mornin with a note up on my chest. Said I'm gone for good, you're no longer the best. Never dreamed there'd be another man for you, so I just went crazy. There was nothing left to do." That'll teach him to spike her punch. Note: she affixed the note to his chest hairs with duct tape.

Mental Breakdown:
"Dancing in the Street" -- The Mamas and the Papas.
Well, "Dancing on the Ceiling" would have been more appropriate, esp. if the MC had been partaking of the magic mushrooms to get over her breakup.

Life is Good:
"Bubble Toes" -- Jack Johnson
Apparently the mushrooms have kicked in and she's now remembering when she was three years old. Wait, is that a flashback? Well, she's taken the hallucininatory drugs, she's entitled to at least two. Which brings us to the next scene:

Flashback:
"That Ain't Love" -- REO Speedwagon.
And it's the mid-80's, and our MC has gotten over the magic mushrooms, and she's kicking the ass of the man she was chasing at the beginning of this flick down the school hallway. Ah, memories.

Fight Song:
(as she's kicking his ass nine ways to Sunday)
"The Way It Is" -- Mark Strand
Hell of a fight, this is actually a poem, and a deathly depressing one at that. "He cannot be heard as he moves behind trees and hedges, always at the frayed edges of town, pulling a gun on someone like me. I crouch under the kitchen table, telling myself, I am a dog. Who would kill a dog?" Let's try a song.
"Rock of Ages" -- Def Leppard
That's more like it! "It's better to burn out than fade away!"

Getting Back Together:
"Roll With the Changes" -- REO again
But what a hell of a set of changes she's rolling with. Why has she stopped kicking this man's ass? Because he's going to be here when she's ready to roll with the changes. Oh, okay, handsome. So let's get married. Okay!

Wedding:
"Cymbeline" -- Loreena McKinnitt
And then he dies.

Paying the Dues:
"Mamma Mia" -- ABBA
"Just one look and I can hear the bells ring. One more look and I forget everything." So I guess she's fallen in love with another guy. Which means she's going to pay and pay.

The Night Before The War:
"Hold On Loosely" -- .38 Special
This story's gone all to hell now. Let's try another song.
"Candle in the Wind" -- Elton John (the Live in Australia one you'd hear in the late '80's.)
That's more like it. General musing on mortality and looking at soldiers' pictures here.

Final Battle:
"Circle in the Sand" -- Belinda Carlisle
Can't we get something a little more, I don't know, monumental?
"On the Shoreline" -- Genesis
"Well, there's a place where two world collide, something something against the pull of the tide. You can stay with your feet on the ground. Or step into the water, leave the dry behind on the shoreline. Where you can only swim if you try!" So she's grappling with the bad guy at the ocean's edge for offing her man at her own wedding!

Moment of Triumph:
"White Lightning" -- George Jones
Which is a song about drinking moonshine. Try again!
"Oh Death" -- Ralph Stanley
So they all get killed, including the MC. The moonshine still at the ocean's edge apparently blew up. And death triumphs once again!

Death Scene:
Um ... Already handled that.

Funeral Song:
"Hells Bells" -- AC/DC
OMG! I swear to God that's what came up!

End Credits:
"Delia's Gone" -- Johnny Cash
"Delia, oh Delia, Delia all my life. If I hadn't shot poor Deila, I'd a-had her for my wife. Delia's gone, one more round, Delia's gone."

Well, that movie went all to hell!

No comments: